Today, I wished time went back..

Sometimes it's a little too late..,
maybe sometimes you forget you are not alone,
maybe you don't really get what it means to share your everyday with another person,
your 'life moments' with the people you love..
How could you know before?
and you will hurt and be hurted so many times...

We are made to be selfish.., I believe it's a 'good' thing.., yes..
There's a time in your life when you HAVE to be selfish..
but then you start evolving and your priorities change..,
of course you will keep being selfish but as we grow up we have to try..
we are better humans when we try..

Today I wished time went back..
I made a fool of myself and I might hurted someone special..

There's a lot of things I don't like..,
I'm really used to say 'NO' and I always did, no matter what..
I'm NOT a typical vanilla sweet girl, I'm strong in my attitudes, opinions and decisions..,
so saying 'NO' is really easy for me.., don't care about social parameters..
This is one of the most important things to me.., the only part of my freedom you all can see..,
do only what my soul tells me, do only whatever I want..
I hate when people follow others like sheeps..
and I used to think I couldn't hate anything more than this..
But today, I discovered I was wrong.., it just lost all the visceral negative meaning for me..

Cause today, I realized, yesterday I was not alone..
and I just discovered that the thing I hate the most is hurting you..

A holistic view of 2008 and New Year resolutions!

I feel free right now, after a peaceful new year's eve in a meaningful place..
I expected more 'action & emotions' maybe, but I know that I couldn't ask for more joy in my life, and that cup of tea at 2am made me feel kind of strange with myself..
Muchos sentimientos encontrados, lots of emotions and some doubts, some fears and lots of hopes..

2008 was a year of facing trouble in my professional area, a year from which I learnt incredible things.
For the first time I can really say I know how it is to work under pressure, I know how to work without resources, to work without any help or support, against all odds, and still achive something.., I know now really how it is to fight for what you believe, even if it is a 45 years old manager who is yelling you otherwise. and I'm so proud of that.
I can say I stood up for some things and I can say I refused some others being faithful to myself..
For the first time, I saw what I have to improve, and for the firt time, I tried and couldn't make it in the first attempt..

2008, in my personal life, was a year of decisions and personal discoveries..

For the first time, I had to accept that some of those decisions were not in my hands.., it was very complex to realize what it means to be in a relationship in terms of decisions.., my decisions, your decisions.., but there was something new: we had 'our' decisions..

I think it is the first time for both of us (even if we had another relationships), so it's not easy at all and it involves quite some maturity and growing up.., but we have a good structure and strong confidence for doing this and it makes me happy..

For 2009 I have some resolutions:

To achieve another step in my professional life
To make a complete change on my habits according to a healthy life style
To get a new soul
To water and take care of my relationship
To give a gift to my parents
To get a new heart
To write