Mostrando las entradas con la etiqueta Love. Mostrar todas las entradas
Mostrando las entradas con la etiqueta Love. Mostrar todas las entradas

domingo, octubre 22, 2017

10 razones mías, 10 conceptos míos, 10 regalos solo míos..

1. Soy capaz de sentarme en el medio del fuego.., incluso contigo, y no hacer nada para huir de él. 
Porque el dolor no se evita ni se traslada a otros.., se vive, con coraje, una sonrisa sanadora a quien amas y una mano amiga, y si tenemos suerte, fluyendo con algunos repertorios musicales..

2. Soy capaz de decidir ser más que esto.., sin endurecer mi corazón ni desterrar mi amor..

3. No.., no me rindo.., mi forma de luchar es distinta.., 

siendo leal conmigo misma y manteniendo la estructura, 
no generando causa y efecto..,
con la realidad innegable de mi esencia, más de una vez demostrada y valorada,
aunque sea contraproducente en aquellas estrategias sociales que funcionan a veces tan bien..

4. Tengo tanto en la vida, en todos los niveles, y a la vez, tanto que ofrecer.., 

que a diferencia de aquellas montañas rusas causadas por coyunturas y dramas.., 
es estructura y eso dura, es una base sólida de locura y cordura en la cantidad exacta, 
y el mejor tesoro que alguien puede recibir.

5. No existe la vida 'perfecta' y siempre habrán obstáculos y fantasmas que nos encadenen, 
yo solo prometo que siempre siempre habrá, caminos que enrumbar.., 
y sólo ellos dirán.., si están hechos para nuestros pies y nuestra piel.

6. Compartir innegable, vibraciones innatas, visiones epistemológicas.., 
inteligencia emocional, flexibilidad, colores y cinestesia perfecta, 
mas una chispa de optimismo y tapas de pasta dental abiertas..,
como analogía de apertura hacia aquello a lo que llamamos vida.., 
y ten cuidado, porque tu vida es hoy.., no mañana..

7. Con el tiempo, las emociones intensas pasan.., 
se agota la energía de la montaña rusa y el drama del tira y jala; 
con el tiempo, todos volvemos a necesitar silencio, 
porque la deseabilidad social es ciertamente insostenible..
Y queda lo real.., sin maquillaje ni esfuerzos extraordinarios, queda la paz y lo que fluye.., lo sencillo e inevitable.., como esas risas escandalosas, marchas airadas, repertorios musicales, y esos refranes equívocos pero tan sabios..

8. Cómo cambiarán las perspectivas cuando haya que afrontar caídas, fracasos y responsabilidades propias del ciclo de la vida; cómo dejan de importar las pasiones y convenciones para dar paso a esos remos que te llevarán a esas metas. 
Y sabes que nadie rema con más coraje, estrategia y actitud que yo.., no sólo porque es mi especialidad, sino porque fui y soy un espejo para tu reflejo.. 
Lo viste, viviste y lo vieron otros, así de real eres, así de real soy..

9. Vive tus días en varios idiomas y diferentes banderas, 
porque es más rico el que entrega más..
Sueña que vuelas sin temor a caer porque habrá un pilar que lee tus ojos y te sostendrá.., y no te engañes ni me engañes, sé que soy el tuyo..
También sé que nací con dislexia de norte y sur, grave e irremediablemente sin brújula, pero no me engaño ni te engañes, sé que eres la mía.. 
Y así como no se rema sin brújula, no hay sueños alcanzables sin pilares fuertes..

10. Valora la estructura, 
yo me propongo abrazar la coyuntura.. 
Porque eso significa una relación: la conjunción complementaria de diferentes estadíos, 
y la libertad para ser uno mismo, sin condiciones, sin apuros, y sin reclamos..
Y sin querer, hoy encontré otra definición del concepto 'amor': 
'saber cuando regalar libertad y cómo luchar con silencio'

jueves, octubre 28, 2010

En cambio no

Forse bastava respirare.., solo respirare muy lento..

Recuperar cada latido en mí.., y no tiene sentido, ahora que no estás..
perchè non può essere abitudine.., senza te..

Invece no.., non cè più tempo per spiegare, per chiedere: 'si te amé lo suficiente'..
io sono qui.., e avrei da dire ancora..

Perchè si spezzano tra i denti le cose più importanti:
'esas palabras que nunca escucharás'..,
Le senti tu?.., pesano e si posano per sempre su di noi..
Pero si me faltas tú, no las puedo repetir.., no las puedo pronunciar..

Me llueven los recuerdos de aquellos días que corríamos al viento..,
quiero soñar.. que puedo hablarte ahora..

E invece no.., non ho più tempo per spiegare.., 
avevo anchio qualcosa da sperare davanti a me..,
qualcosa da finire insieme a te.

Forse bastava aspettare.. e solo respirare muy lento..
forse è tardi.., forse invece no.. 

miércoles, octubre 28, 2009

Maravilla de una noche de leyenda

Un inicio en la sorpresa de un encuentro casual..,
.. si es que existe algo como un inicio cuando la noche juega al azar..

Sin saber, sin planear, sin calcular..,
como ocurren las cosas más hermosas..
fuimos creando una maravilla y una ofrenda..
Un ángel las vio y quiso tenerlas..
Ahora sé que su intención no era exactamente esa.

Esperó otra época.., una lucha, una distracción..,
aprovechó una cadena de locuras y una pizca de inmadurez necesaria..,
tan necesaria en la humanidad..
Y qué locuras!
Aprovechó el sabio ciclo de la vida y el consecuente ciclo del amor..,
y por qué no.., aprovechó los miedos terrenales.., tán básicos..
aprovechó que eramos dos, y se las llevó..
Ahora sé que sólo las quería prestadas..

Sintió ternura, felicidad y calor..,
esculpió con su aliento una vez más nuestra maravilla y ofrenda..
..hasta que se volvió leyenda..
Y esparció aquello desde su corazón..
Quién fuera el afortunado mi amor.., quienes fueran..,
con un tesoro de verdad..
aunque los conceptos de felicidad no puedan nunca cambiar..

Y nos devolvió con un toque mágico lo que tomó prestado..
después de la lucha, después de la tiranía de la cordura..
porque nos vio.., porque fue y es nuestro..
y ahora qué? si se necesitan dos...

lunes, mayo 18, 2009

Una de aquellas cosas que me dejó Mario Benedetti

No te salves

"No te quedes inmóvil al borde del camino,
no congeles el júbilo,

no quieras con desgana,
no te salves ahora ni nunca.

No te salves.


No te llenes de calma,

no reserves del mundo,

sólo un rincón tranquilo,

no dejes caer los párpados

pesados como juicios,

no te quedes sin labios,

no te duermas sin sueño,

no te pienses sin sangre,

no te juzgues sin tiempo.


Pero si, pese a todo, no puedes evitarlo;
y congelas el júbilo,
y quieres con desgana,

y te salvas ahora,

y te llenas de calma,

y reservas del mundo,

sólo un rincón tranquilo,

y dejas caer los párpados

pesados como juicios,

y te secas sin labios,

y te duermes sin sueño,

y te piensas sin sangre,

y te juzgas sin tiempo,

y te quedas inmóvil
al borde del camino,
y te salvas;

entonces
no te quedes conmigo".


Mario Benedetti
Un luchador, un soñador, un hombre con una sensibilidad y capacidad de amar inigualables,
.. el mundo necesita que te recordemos..
1920 - 2009

PD: Yo te dejo, esta noche de insomnio, de pensamientos desesperados que calmaste con uno de tus poemas, y por supuesto.., una lapicera..
Celeste..

sábado, marzo 28, 2009

My sixth sense was right..

Exactly 1 month ago, my sixth sense told me so but I didn't want to listen because it seemed so incredible.., I couldn't believe thoughts or feelings can 'change' that quickly..
Is it a matter of selfishness?
Was that the real reason I didn't travel there??
Is really all around so freaking amazing that makes EVERYTHING ELSE look as the borest thing in the world???
Am I?
No, definitely I'm not!
I don't think it's 'real' if people change values, priorities, feelings, sense of responsibility, likes and dislikes in 1 month, not even in 2..
Is fitting in so important?.., we are not 15 anymore..!

Nevertheless, I understand..
I understand it cause I know the power of vanity, the power of membership and the power of those incentives that make life so new that you just want more and more, as if you don't realize that nothing is 'new' forever, and nothing is freaking amazing forever..

So, my sixth sense was right..
It hurts to feel that right now, trivial things are more certain and more important than deep ones.., when I never asked a choice to be made.., when you can have both.., when I can have both..
Yeah.. it hurts to feel I'm not enough or not that freaking amazing..

But that's it.., that's love..
Cause we all grow up in the process and we all have the right to be selfish, to doubt, to be afraid, to make mistakes, to learn, and to say 'I'm sorry'..
Love isn't always fair for both parts at the same time, and it is a whole package..
Love is to accept that sometimes when you win, you loose..
You'll maybe loose a little part of your freedom; but you win the best reason to smile..
You win a person with whom you'll share your losts, your tears and your successes.., withouth any mask, withouth any repairs..

But how lucky would we be if we can have both!
I think not so many people can say that.., and I totally believe I give that in my relationship, when did we deny each other some freedom?.., we have that, we give each other that great balance.., so.. isn't THAT freaking amazing???

Nobody said it would be easy though..
I discovered that in a crisis we both can not be selfish at the very same time..,
and I understand it's not my turn to be selfish now..,
So I will shut up cause that's my best shot to make my point.. ;)


lunes, enero 19, 2009

Today, I wished time went back..

Sometimes it's a little too late..,
maybe sometimes you forget you are not alone,
maybe you don't really get what it means to share your everyday with another person,
your 'life moments' with the people you love..
How could you know before?
and you will hurt and be hurted so many times...

We are made to be selfish.., I believe it's a 'good' thing.., yes..
There's a time in your life when you HAVE to be selfish..
but then you start evolving and your priorities change..,
of course you will keep being selfish but as we grow up we have to try..
we are better humans when we try..

Today I wished time went back..
I made a fool of myself and I might hurted someone special..

There's a lot of things I don't like..,
I'm really used to say 'NO' and I always did, no matter what..

I'm NOT a typical vanilla sweet girl, I'm strong in my attitudes, opinions and decisions..,
so saying 'NO' is really easy for me.., don't care about social parameters..

This is one of the most important things to me.., the only part of my freedom you all can see..,
do only what my soul tells me, do only whatever I want..

I hate when people follow others like sheeps..
and I used to think I couldn't hate anything more than this..

But today, I discovered I was wrong.., it just lost all the visceral negative meaning for me..

Cause today, I realized, yesterday I was not alone..
and I just discovered that the thing I hate the most is hurting you..


sábado, abril 21, 2007

Underneath the magic of Elsa & Fred

"Life is measured by the number of moments that take your breath away"..
An idea I've always lived with.., my ulterior philosophy, and a way to die feeling 'happy'..

A film by Marcos Carnevale, with the extraordinary China Zorrila and Manuel Alexandre, in probably, one of their best performance and one of my favorite movies..

Incredibly beautiful Lito Vitale's soundtrack, that made me feel I couln't stand more emotions in my body.. Listening to the music after seeing the movie has become painfully GOOD!

An excellent movie because of the huge spectrum of colors that take us to very high emotions.., because it gives a life lesson in a simple, sutil but deep way, complementing with the most 'real' of human non-verbal language.

An admirable Director's work, from my point of view, because I think one has to be brave and also really good to be able to work on this 'repeated' theme, showing on screen 'just' 2 people falling in love, BUT making it different, overwhelming and getting such a big connection with the audience.

A solid script, with simple structure but very deep, with good taste and delicate sense of humor, and with a majestic performance of leading actors.

My angel brought to me this movie.., on a moment as perfect as magic, when everything in my life is changing and evolving into an abstract 'form' I haven't recognized yet, but have started to love already.. 
Definitely, one of the sweetest movies I've ever seen.. and probably the one that shows better that life is measured by the number of moments that take your breath away.., even if it happens at the end of your path..

Película en español aquí 

lunes, febrero 26, 2007

My bedroom has changed this Monday

When I thought about the "first Monday".., 
I knew it was gonna be weird, grey and sad..
.. But I had NO idea how much it would hurt..

Here I am.., 
feeling like I'm in the middle of nothing.. 
Looking desperately for the smile of my eyes, 
and asking my dancing desires and my libido: 'till when are you gonna hide?

How empty this Monday evening can be?!!! 
.. and the weekend was only better cause I had the challenge to convince everyone I was still ME.. 
I didn't know I was gonna leave that much there.. 
I've felt this sensation before.., and I know it always goes away, after a while.. 

But this is the FIRST time I feel MY BEDROOM empty.. 
This sensation is totally new for my 26 years old.. 
Yes.., it will also go away.., but I won't hurry up.., 
cause I need to discover its meaning..

I'm still totally amazed to realize I'm feeling something so new in something so old.. 
So amazed to realize how many things I found in my past.. 
.. a past that will be always perfect to shape my future..

In the meantime.., I will hug my sadness and enjoy it..,
 
with my cat and my music that always find the perfect mood for each moment..


'Hoy quisiera detener el tiempo.., la distancia entre los dos..' 
'Soy fragilidad sin tí.. ' 
'Son las cosas de la vida.., que nos quedan por vivir..'

jueves, diciembre 29, 2005

Tra te e il mare a Venezia

Almost without sleeping since monday 26 because of all the travel arrangements I wrote in the last post, I finally arrived to Venice..
Got the visas!!!!!!! and even if I almost die pulling around Paris all my 'one year' luggage, everything is on track..
Cheap flights not always land in the 'popular city', so I arrived to Venice at 10pm and it was very difficult to find a cheap hostal or B&B.., I had to keep carrying my bags around for 2 hours until I found something I could afford (35 euros), it was midnight!..

I was death.. but I couldn't waste this night!, my father told me Piazza San Marcos is beautiful at night and I wanted to take some pictures for him.. cause tomorrow night I will be in a train already.., so, I took my Ipod and I start walking.., suddenly, a song trapped me and you got into my mind..
After an hour walking I found a bote still working and I jumped in.., it was so strange and so beautiful, everything was dark, no people around, no movement.., Oh my God!, it seems like a ghost town, I loved it!, 2am.., totally alone in Piazza San Marcos, it was totally worthed and I thought a lot about my family..










I took some pictures for my father.. and I started my walk back..
This song doesn't want to let me go, and I know it has a reason..
It's just the moment for this song.., and as much as I love Laura Pausini, tonight, this song has been my travel partner and my closure, in some way..
It's 3:29am, and with 2005 almost ending, I think I will finally let this history to end..
"Con l'istinto di chi sa' amare.., 'preferisco dirti addio"

Tra te e il mare

domingo, diciembre 25, 2005

I won't have any 'what if' in my life..

All this time trying to find peace..,
all this time looking for a place to live and a job to survive..,
but YOU came along..,
and you know I can't stop being fool for love..

This time the risk will be totally my fault..,
and I'm not surprised to know that I will do it..,
I will certainly watch myself jumping into that risk..

Why did you appear in my life??, why now???, and why from so far?
it's NOT a good timing and it's NOT a good moment for me..,
cause I've developed some needs and if you cover them
now, I will fall in love..
I'm getting there.., at least I have all the symptoms..

In the meantime, and as usual.., I don't care..

I know I will take that plane..,
and I will only know in some days..,

.. in some days, when I find myself in THAT situation or in a beautiful dream instead..
What a crazy thing to do!,

putting in risk my house, my security, my basic needs..,
what a dreamer or how stupid.. :)

But it has an logical and philosophycal explanation in my way to see life:
NEVER keep a "what if" in you mind..
I could never forgive myself if I do that.., so I take the risk..,
cause is better have something to regret.., than regret for not doing anything..

martes, noviembre 22, 2005

Is there a hide reason for all this?

More problems..

My papers from Russia are gonna take more days to arrive! so I can't tramit the visa..
I had ONLY 5 days to tramit visa cause I don't have a house here and don't have money either..
Then, I discovered russian visa takes 10 days to be issued!!.., you can have it sooner of course, but you have to pay accordingly, even in 2 days if you have the money.. 35, 47, 92, 140 euros..
I won't have a place to sleep after this sunday.., with my 48kg of luggage!

So, I don't have time.., and really, I don't have money..
But I'll survive.., I always do..
RUSSIA must worth all this!, I will make i
t worthed!

Mi new laptop won't start.., because of the incident in Prague.., HP people said they have to take it to Paris to see if guarantee can cover it.., I almost die..
They took it today.., I feel helpless cause I just bought it, and maybe it will be huge money in the garbage..!, the money my parents gave me with a lot of effort.., the money they gave me to be safe here..
But I'm thinking about the things my mother told me: 'Don't
be sad about materials things.., the most important is that you are OK and healthly'...
I can almost hear her voice... I miss her..


I feel bad things are happening to me..., I'm tired of struggeling and I feel lonely..
I'm stucked AGAIN in this city I've never liked and days are passing by without good news...
... what is keeping me soooo long in Brescia??..., there must be a reason, right?
Today, you called.., was s
weet..
Is that it?

Is that gonna take me to some fantasy land with the power to erase every bad memory???

lunes, noviembre 14, 2005

Quiero estados mentales!

Hay cosas que no se pueden compartir estando tan lejos.., sensaciones.., miradas.., estados mentales..
No me basta con hechos y acciones.., quiero estados mentales!

Pido mucho quizá para personas que intentan ser prácticas..., anyway, esto es algo que se esperaba.., no todos somos iguales..

.. It is not how sweet little papers said...

No tiene que ver con el tiempo real.., tiene que ver con entender la importancia de detenerse a observar y observarse..
Sin embargo, el tiempo 'real' es real.., y siempre peligrarán nuestras almas ante la velocidad con la que gira el mundo..

There isn't such a thing as "time" 
... el tiempo se crea cuando uno valora algo... 
... es cuestión de elecciones... 
Mirar atrás un SOLO día es una cosa.., mirar atrás toda una vida es otra...

No me sorprende entonces el número infinito de almas que jamás se encontraron a sí mismas.
Qué tristeza imaginar esos ojos, finalmente mirando hacia atrás un día, y sólo encontrando imágenes borrosas, decisiones sin sentido y consecuencias esparcidas...

Puedes acelerar tus pasos.., pero recuerda que si te pierdes, puedes perderte para siempre, o demorarte una vida en regresar..

Qué bello es mirar atrás al final del día... 
.. pero qué triste es mirar atrás sólo al final de toda una vida...

domingo, junio 19, 2005

Time to say 'goodbye'..

Time to say goodbye...
As all humans, we love tragedy...

My little brother didn't like the news.., maybe he didn't get it when I said goodbye in a memorable family weekend in the north of Peru...
Great moments with my father are not that usual anymore.., conection with my mother is not that simple anymore.., we needed that weekend off and it was amazing and confortable!

Time with friends.., time with special ones.., time with myself to control excitement and fear..
Time with you, we've said goodbye more than once during these last 2 months.., maybe we sorted some things out, maybe we made them more complicated..., some sangria in the same confortable place, some checks added to our checklists, some unfinished talks, some tender looks and some lies.., and as usual, it was perfect between us..

Plans made to stop in Germany.., impossible to skip it...
I need to see somebody before starting a new life, and timing was perfect.., before Italy, before Cameroon..

Visa Schengen opened for 1 year!
Tickets bought! - Lima - Madrid - Germany - Italy..

Then I said goodbye to my life until my dreams are achieved...

viernes, mayo 06, 2005

What tears mean sometimes...

Not always equal to sadness or suffering tears..
.. and they are the best ones ;)
Sharing, remembering, and feeling certain moments again can make you feel very sensitive and vulnerable sometimes... .. and as if it weren't enough!.. There are always those few people who just have that kind of power on you: they are able to hurt you very deep.. And that's really the beautiful thing for me!.. People who can hurt you the most are not your enemies.., people who can impact on you the most are those you love and those that love you back... In an specific perspective, it doesn't matter if they actually hurt you or make you happy, it doesn't matter if it's in a direct or indirect way.., cause the true fact is ONLY that they CAN.., they are the only ones that can destroy you emotionally.. :)
... and that's why a lot of people are afraid to love...
Cause nothing will hurt you more than see them suffer.., and nothing will matter to you more than their happiness, their well-being, their opinions about your decisions, and how they show to you with each act or detail that they care about you...
These kind of tears I'm talking about appear when you care...
.. then you are living!..
And you asked me again: why?..
.. don't you know I am extremaly happy for being able to feel and dare like "this"?, in a way not everybody can.., for being able to love and let you love me?.. why don't you?
But at the end of the day, at the end of the life.., I will say I conquered that fear..
Fear to suffer, fear to live, fear to die.. Hard of course, but.. tell me if you can, what really bad can happen? There is so much in the world to be afraid of.. but not this!.. not my own feelings! not even yours..
With whom will you dare to be yourself if it's not with your special ones??
But you keep asking me why?
I loose my count.. ... I love to cry.., I love feeling exhausted after it..
This time was not for you..
For my Tril.., my reason today..

lunes, enero 03, 2005

NEW YEAR 2005!

...Quizá un último año nuevo en Lima por un tiempo...

Este fue el año nuevo de la estafa de la fiesta en Asia.., 
afortunadamente el mío fue más tranquilo y con menos decepciones.. 

Un año nuevo que terminó en 2 días olvidándome del mundo sin planearlo, 2 días en una carpa sin las provisiones necesarias, ya que por alguna razón, no pude moverme y la inercia me invadió. 
La compañía fue perfecta esos 2 días.., casi como si hubiera estado conmigo misma.. 
Fue un año donde dejé muchas obsesiones, que aunque "olvidadas", siempre recordaré a mi manera.., con una sonrisa.. 

Fue un año en que me volví a enamorar (o al menos creí hacerlo..), 
después de aquella vez en la que esa posibilidad se veía tan lejos, 
a pesar de que sabía que volvería a hacerlo.., 
ahora sé que cada vez será totalmente diferente y eso me lleva a preguntarme.. 
cómo sabré entonces la diferencia?

Un año en el cual aprendí que hay gente que no "quiere" ser feliz.. y no lo sabe.., 
cuán grande puede ser el poder del miedo.. 
Un año donde confirmé que amar no es suficiente y que, aunque el amor no exista, cómo se sufre por ese concepto! (que rompí hace algún tiempo)
Un año donde superé lo más difícil que me ha tocado hasta ahora.. decepciones, incertidumbre y momentos en los que no quería levantarme.. 

Y acá estoy, celebrando fin de año con personas importantes cerca.. nunca faltan los roces y expectativas distintas.. pero las amistades que duran y las superan son invaluables.. 
Un poco de vino y tequila en Asia; una conversación especial, que quizá nunca llegué a entender; una llamada lindísima, some dancing, un par de confesiones.., y un atardecer en la playa contigo.. 
Gracias a todos los que compartieron sus "2014" conmigo..

¡FELIZ AÑO NUEVO 2005!

Atardecer en la playa.. bella forma de empezar el año.. Gracias!