Maravilla de una noche de leyenda

Un inicio en la sorpresa de un encuentro casual..,
.. si es que existe algo como un inicio cuando la noche juega al azar..

Sin saber, sin planear, sin calcular..,

como ocurren las cosas más hermosas..

fuimos creando una maravilla y una ofrenda..

Un ángel las vio y quiso tenerlas..

Ahora sé que su intención no era exactamente esa.

Esperó otra época.., una lucha, una distracción..,

aprovechó una cadena de locuras y una pizca de inmadurez necesaria..,

tan necesaria en la humanidad..

Y qué locuras!

Aprovechó el sabio ciclo de la vida y el consecuente ciclo del amor..,

y por qué no.., aprovechó los miedos terrenales.., tán básicos..

aprovechó que eramos dos, y se las llevó..

Ahora sé que sólo las quería prestadas..

Sintió ternura, felicidad y calor..,

esculpió con su aliento una vez más nuestra maravilla y ofrenda..

..hasta que se volvió leyenda..

Y esparció aquello desde su corazón..

Quién fuera el afortunado mi amor.., quienes fueran..,

con un tesoro de verdad..

aunque los conceptos de felicidad no puedan nunca cambiar..

Y nos devolvió con un toque mágico lo que tomó prestado..

después de la lucha, después de la tiranía de la cordura..

porque nos vio.., porque fue y es nuestro..

y ahora qué? si se necesitan dos...

I'm writing my life as I live it..

Now.., I really see how challenges surprise you all of a sudden.., things you wouldn't imagine you will have to deal with.., and yes.., the troubles I've lived never crossed my mind when, some years ago, I used to think about my future.. I keep doing things that scare me though.., I strongly recommend that! I try not to spend my time on jelousy and I kept all my love letters.. I started to take care of my body.. I dance.., I laugh.., I strecht :) I have a great bond with my parents I didn't have before.., and I have friends to hold on, friends that will stay timeless.. Only one thing didn't change: I still don't know what I will do with my life.. .. and that's good.., cause I want surprises.., I prefer to write my life as I live it.., day by day.., page by page.., it's good for me not to have all my life figured out.., I don't wanna know where I will be tomorrow.., I just wanna know what makes my world goes round.., that's enough.. Feeling this moment is a good one to listen to these advices again.. It has always moved me and everytime I hear it I see another side of it.. I know I will always remember to dance, laugh and stretch.., to dare to love and to dare to write..

Just.. 'disarming..'

One of the most amazing and disarming melodies I've heard..,

capable of exalt my very deep and pure emotions..

Vuelvo

'Vuelvo..,
quiero creer que estoy volviendo..,
con mi peor y mi mejor historia..
conozco este camino de memoria..,
pero igual me sorprendo..

Hay tanto siempre que no llega nunca..,
tanta osadía, tanta paz dispersa,
tanta luz que era sombra y viceversa..,
y tanta vida trunca..

Vuelvo y pido perdón por la tardanza..,
se debe a que hice muchos borradores..,
me quedan dos o tres viejos rencores,
y sólo una confianza..'

Mario Benedetti

Venice, the queen of Italy

Definitely the queen of Italy..
A city that makes us instantly evoke this sweet and magic country.., a place that makes us evoke Vivaldi, Bellini, Tiziano, Tintoretto and Marco Polo..

I know I didn't get to visit Florence in spring, but certainly Venice was my favorite place..

In the north of Italy, in the coast of Adriatic Sea, we can find one the most attractive and peculiar cities in our planet, that was one of the most important commercial power that has ever existed in the Mediterranean.

Venice traded with the Byzantine Empire and the Muslim world, becoming the most prosperous city in the whole Europe in 13 century, that's when they built all those superb palaces and support the work of the most talented and greatest artists..

What a history from V century!, when Germanic invasions lead some Roman citizens to take refuge in the islands.., its marvelous height and the sad decline, as history repeats..
Now, while I take a walk through the Great Canal, it just doesn't seem to matter how many times Venice was totally devastated.., nothing compares its majestuosity..

And Piazza San Marcos was magic.., standing in the same heart of the Renaissance Venice, I felt I was in another era, living some moments I watch once in a while in movies.., maybe in a fancy party with a superb dress, or in a colossal concert with multiple choruses and instrumental groups..

Maybe it wasn't such a great idea to travel alone to this exceptional place, but timing was not good and I was not sure if I was going to be again so near Venice as I was then..
So, I enjoyed it to the maximum and all I did was painting some memories and images in mind, to share them with you some day.., and maybe, just maybe, I will also have that romantic gondola tour I refused to take this time..

The Great Canal

Venice Lagoon

My moments, pictures and thoughts in Venice

My father told me Piazza San Marcos was incredibly beautiful, and he wasn't wrong..,

I think here I had one of the greatest moments of my whole trip.., coming back to Renaissance, as I described in my last post..

My moment in Piazza San Marcos

It was so beautiful to be in a city without any roads at all, something totally different for me..
Cars just doesn't exist there and actually gondolas are only for us, romantic turists, cause taxi botes and private botes are the transportation used in everyday basis..

Going in botes through the Great Canal, walking through some of the 400 bridges and passing by some of those 177 small canals that make 118 islands.., I keep thinking it would have been great to have some great company.., but in this moment of my life I can totally use some time alone to think about all what comes: like applying to MC Peru before January 6th, meeting my boyfriend in Rome, trying to get to Ukraine without dying in the attempt, build some LCs there, make my way to Poland and PEACE project.., then Belgium and Netherlands, for mention some..

Yes.., my Venice time was only for me, an even if I missed taking that gondola with someone special, I think it was a sweet and a deep trip on my own..

I know someday I will take that 'romantic gondola or bote', maybe not in Venice but in some other exquisite place.., maybe Turkey, Greece or Thailand, or maybe in Peru.. :)

Rediscovering 'Billie Jean'

Michael Jackson's 'Billie Jean' was great without a doubt..

Always liked the lyrics and the story behind.., 'real life' for Michael Jackson when a fan claimed he was the father of her son.. 

In some way, for me, the lyrics just didn't match the rhythm.., but in 2008, Chris Cornell, ex-Soundgarden and ex-Audioslave made a great cover. 

And later, David Cook rocked on stage during American Idol 2008 competition, becoming the favorite to win that year competition..

Before listening these 2008 new versions, I never really felt how amazing Billie Jean was.., but it has become my favorite 2008 song, I just can't get enough of the sweet pain in my stomach and high emotions that take my breath away during his high vocals and amazing arregements..

Can't decide which version is the best, or which singer is the best..

Chris Cornell vs David Cook.. impossible to decide for me..

Una de aquellas cosas que me dejó Mario Benedetti

No te salves

"No te quedes inmóvil al borde del camino,
no congeles el júbilo,
no quieras con desgana,
no te salves ahora ni nunca.
No te salves.

No te llenes de calma,
no reserves del mundo,
sólo un rincón tranquilo,
no dejes caer los párpados
pesados como juicios,
no te quedes sin labios,
no te duermas sin sueño,
no te pienses sin sangre,
no te juzgues sin tiempo.

Pero si, pese a todo, no puedes evitarlo;
y congelas el júbilo,
y quieres con desgana,
y te salvas ahora,
y te llenas de calma,
y reservas del mundo,
sólo un rincón tranquilo,
y dejas caer los párpados
pesados como juicios,
y te secas sin labios,
y te duermes sin sueño,
y te piensas sin sangre,
y te juzgas sin tiempo,
y te quedas inmóvil al borde del camino,
y te salvas;
entonces no te quedes conmigo".

Mario Benedetti
Un luchador, un soñador, un hombre con una sensibilidad y capacidad de amar inigualables,
.. el mundo necesita que te recordemos..
1920 - 2009

PD: Yo te dejo, esta noche de insomnio, de pensamientos desesperados que calmaste con uno de tus poemas, y por supuesto.., una lapicera..

Celeste..

My sixth sense was right..

Exactly 1 month ago, my sixth sense told me so but I didn't want to listen because it seemed so incredible.., I couldn't believe thoughts or feelings can 'change' that quickly..
Is it a matter of selfishness?
Was that the real reason I didn't travel there??
Is really all around so freaking amazing that makes EVERYTHING ELSE look as the borest thing in the world???
Am I?
No, definitely I'm not!
I don't think it's 'real' if people change values, priorities, feelings, sense of responsibility, likes and dislikes in 1 month, not even in 2..
Is fitting in so important?.., we are not 15 anymore..!

Nevertheless, I understand..
I understand it cause I know the power of vanity, the power of membership and the power of those incentives that make life so new that you just want more and more, as if you don't realize that nothing is 'new' forever, and nothing is freaking amazing forever..

So, my sixth sense was right..
It hurts to feel that right now, trivial things are more certain and more important than deep ones.., when I never asked a choice to be made.., when you can have both.., when I can have both..
Yeah.. it hurts to feel I'm not enough or not that freaking amazing..

But that's it.., that's love..
Cause we all grow up in the process and we all have the right to be selfish, to doubt, to be afraid, to make mistakes, to learn, and to say 'I'm sorry'..
Love isn't always fair for both parts at the same time, and it is a whole package..
Love is to accept that sometimes when you win, you loose..
You'll maybe loose a little part of your freedom; but you win the best reason to smile..
You win a person with whom you'll share your losts, your tears and your successes.., withouth any mask, withouth any repairs..

But how lucky would we be if we can have both!
I think not so many people can say that.., and I totally believe I give that in my relationship, when did we deny each other some freedom?.., we have that, we give each other that great balance.., so.. isn't THAT freaking amazing???

Nobody said it would be easy though..
I discovered that in a crisis we both can not be selfish at the very same time..,
and I understand it's not my turn to be selfish now..,
So I will shut up cause that's my best shot to make my point.. ;)

A night with Marc Anthony..

From Puerto Rico, with an impressive talent in one of my favorite genders of music, Marc Anthony was here in Lima tonight, with his perfect voice that creates amazingly melodious arrangements..

Me quedó cortísimo su concierto y sentí hervir mi sangre por más.., definitely I can not just listen to his musci, dancing is a MUST!

A pesar de que se esperaba mucho más de este concierto por la presencia de Willie Colón, quien no pudo estar por razones de salud, Marc Anthony, con su sencillez de siempre se ganó al público al decir que trataría de compensar la ausencia de Willie lo mejor que pudiera..

Sí, quizá yo esperaba un concierto de 3 horas donde estos 2 astros cantaran a dúo muchos clásicos y apasionaran a la gente con sus voces..., sin embargo, cuando escuché: 'Valió la pena' se me olvidó todo y lo único que quería era crear una super coreografía para bailar esa canción..

Volví a constatar que 'Te conozco bien' es una de mis favoritas y casi me muero cuando la escuché hacia el final del concierto.., me fascinó el arreglo de piano que escuché en 'Hasta ayer' (que me fascina también) y los timbales de 'Contra la corriente'.., realmente impresionante..; pero extrañé muchísimo la versión salsa de 'Ahora quién'..

Dejo aquí una de mis canciones favoritas y un clásico con la India :)

Percibiendo..

The ravages of your absence finally went down..
Nevertheless, these days I've been stressed out about some uncertainty on my path..
Today my doubt finished.., but I don't know if I'm happy with the results..

My sixth sense turned on and I know how things are gonna be.., maybe it's time..
Besides my professional life, I felt something else..

Everything is great!, lots of beautiful words and conversations, some offerings of chocolate cake and pasta.., some telephatic sharing, some dancing, support, and cuddle thinking..
Frequency went down but it's just the way it has to be, everything is great..
isn't it?

My sixth sense whispered me with the test results..,
it appeared again when that 'letter' and 'planning' took place..,
it spoke to me when I saw some changes.., but changes are good, right?,
my sixth sense just doesn't want to go away, it's trying to tell me something..
Maybe it's just me and my ghosts.., my fears, my stubbornness to make comparisons..

I think I thought you didn't listen in the same way..,
it wasn't a good moment maybe..,
yes, I understand your world even if I'm angry cause you left me waiting..

Live.., listen.., learn.., grow up.., cry.., forget.., and start again..
Meanwhile, my sixth sense keeps talking to me..

El cuento más corto de Chejov

Quizá simbolismo más que argumento..
Dentro de mi recorrido por la cultura y literatura rusa, les presento algunos insights de la sociedad de aquel entonces en:

El Album
Anton Chejov
1860 - 1904

El consejero administrativo Craterov, delgado y seco como la flecha del Almirantazgo, avanzó algunos pasos y, dirigiéndose a Serlavis, le dijo:
- Excelencia, constantemente alentados y conmovidos hasta el fondo del corazón por vuestra gran autoridad y paternal solicitud...
- Durante más de 10 años, -le sopló Zacoucine.
- Durante más de 10 años..., en este día memorable, nosotros, vuestros subordinados, ofrecemos a su excelencia, como prueba de respeto y de profunda gratitud, este álbum con nuestros retratos, haciendo votos porque vuestra noble vida se prolongue muchos años y que por largo tiempo aún, hasta la hora de la muerte nos honréis con...
- Vuestras paternales enseñanzas en el camino de la verdad y del progreso, -añadió Zacoucine, enjugándose las gotas de sudor que de pronto le habían invadido la frente.
Se veía que ardía en deseos de tomar la palabra para colocar el discurso que seguramente traía preparado.
- Y que -concluyó- vuestro estandarte siga flotando mucho tiempo aún en la carrera del genio, del trabajo y de la conciencia social.
Por la mejilla izquierda de Serlavis, llena de arrugas, se deslizó una lágrima.
- Señores -dijo con voz temblorosa-, no esperaba yo ésto, no podía imaginar que celebraseis mi modesto jubileo. Estoy emocionado, profundamente emocionado y conservaré el recuerdo de estos instantes hasta la muerte. Creedme, amigos míos, os aseguro que nadie os desea como yo tantas felicidades... Si alguna vez ha habido pequeñas dificultades... ha sido siempre en bien de todos vosotros...
Serlavis, actual consejero de Estado, dio un abrazo a Craterov, consejero de estado administrativo, que no esperaba semejante honor y que palideció de satisfacción. Luego, con el rostro bañado en lágrimas como si le hubiesen arrebatado el precioso álbum en vez de ofrecérselo, hizo un gesto con la mano para indicar que la emoción le impedía hablar. Después, calmándose un poco, dijo unas cuantas palabras más muy afectuosas, estrechó a todos la mano y, en medio del entusiasmo y de sonoras aclamaciones, se instaló en su coche abrumado de bendiciones. Durante el trayecto sintió su pecho invadido de un júbilo desconocido hasta entonces y de nuevo se le saltaron las lágrimas.

En su casa le esperaban nuevas satisfacciones. Su familia, sus amigos y conocidos, le hicieron tal ovación que hubo un momento en que creyó sinceramente haber efectuado grandes servicios a la patria y que hubiese sido una gran desgracia para ella que él no hubiese existido. Durante la comida del jubileo no cesaron los brindis, los discursos, los abrazos y las lágrimas. En fin, que Serlavis no esperaba que sus méritos fuesen premiados tan calurosamente.
- Señores -dijo en el momento de los postres-, hace dos horas he sido indemnizado por todos los sufrimientos que esperan al hombre que se ha puesto al servicio, no ya de la forma ni de la letra, si se me permite expresarlo así, sino del deber. Durante toda mi carrera he sido siempre fiel al principio de que no es el público el que se ha hecho para nosotros, sino nosotros los que estamos hechos para él. Y hoy he recibido la más alta recompensa. Mis subordinados me han ofrecido este álbum que me ha llenado de emoción.
Todos los rostros se inclinaron sobre el álbum para verlo.
- ¡Qué bonito es! -dijo Olga, la hija de Serlavis-. Estoy segura de que no cuesta menos de cincuenta rublos. ¡Oh, es magnífico! ¿Me lo das, papá? Tendré mucho cuidado con él... ¡Es tan bonito!
Después de la comida, Olga se llevó el álbum a su habitación y lo guardó en su secreter.

Al día siguiente arrancó los retratos de los funcionarios tirándolos al suelo y colocó en su lugar los de sus compañeras de pensión. Los uniformes cedieron el sitio a las esclavinas blancas.
Nicolás, el hijo pequeño de su excelencia, recortó los retratos de los funcionarios y pintó sus trajes de rojo. Colocó bigotes en los labios afeitados y barbas oscuras en los mentones imberbes. Cuando no tuvo más que colorear, recortó siluetas y les atravesó los ojos con una aguja, para jugar con ellas a los soldados. Al consejero Craterov lo pegó de pie en una caja de cerillas y lo llevó colocado así al despacho de su padre.
- Papá, mira un monumento
Serlavis se echó a reir, movió la cabeza y, enternecido, dio un sonoro beso en la mejilla a Nicolás.
- Anda pilluelo, enséñaselo a mamá para que lo vea ella también..

Getting a new soul, un alma rusa..

Following my New Year resolutions, today, a new soul will start enriching my life.., a russian one.

Today, I have started to learn the russian language..
Cumpliendo lo prometido en mi resoluciones de Año Nuevo, hoy, un alma nueva empezará a enriquecer mi vida, un alma rusa.
Hoy, he empezado a estudiar el idioma ruso..

Hace 3 años fui elegida para trabajar en Recursos Humanos en AIESEC UFA en Rusia, iba a vivir en un país de una historia controversial y una cultura bella y sumamente interesante.., yo vivía en Italia en esas fechas y estaba lista para mudarme pero la embajada de Rusia en Milán no me dio la visa, y con esa decisión, cambió mi rumbo de vida totalmente..
3 years ago, I was selected to work in Human Resources in AIESEC UFA in Rusia, I was to live in a country with a controversial history and beautiful culture, but, the russian embassy in Milan didn't give me the visa and with that decision the path of my life totally changed..

Se dice que en la vida nada sucede porque sí.., y aunque jamás sabré lo que hubiera sido el 2006 en Rusia, fui increíblemente feliz en Ucrania y en Polonia.
Maybe in life nothing happens just because.., and even if I'd never know what it would be 2006 in Rusia, I was incredibly happy in Ukraine and Poland.

Aprenderé a hablar ruso no solamente para suplir ese 'qué hubiera sido si'.., sino porque cuando estuve en Kirovograd y Mikolaiv (Ucrania) realmente me enamoré de ese sonido tan exquisito para mis oídos, y en realidad, me doy cuenta de que NO es ahora que decidí estudiar el idioma, sino aquella tarde de ese día de Enero del 2005..
I will learn russian not only because that 'what if' but because when I was in Kirovograd and Mikolaiv (Ukraine) I fell in love with that sound so exquisite for my ears, and I realize it's not today but that afternoon on that day of January 2005 that I decided to learn the language..

Racionalmente, quiero aprender una lengua eslava, ya que sólo manejo lenguas romances y germánicas.., y qué mejor que la madre de las lenguas eslavas, con la cual podría entender también el ucraniano :)
Racionally, I want to learn an slavic language, cause I only know latin and german languages so which better than the mother of slavic language with which I will understand ucranian as well :)

Tomaré clases particulares, sólo sábados por cuestión de tiempo.., hoy fue la primera!, me encantó! y estoy contentísima con el profesor que me recomendaron, una persona muy culta, agradable y honesta.., cómo es la vida, no?, cada decisión que tomas te trae otras sorpresas, y en este caso, gané también un amigo. Yo recomendaría infinitamente al profesor José Manuel Ballesteros no sólo porque enseña idiomas, historia universal, geografía y actualidad, entre otros, sino porque es un profesor de la vida misma..
I'll take particular classes only saturdays, today was the first and I loved it!, I'm extremaly happy with my professor.., it's amazing how each decision brings other surprises, and in this case, I also will win a good friend.. I'll recommend José Manuel Ballesteros because he teaches languages, history, geography and literature, but mostly because he teaches about life..

Dejo aquí un video como muestra de lo que aprenderé..
Here I leave a russian video as a sample of what I will learn..

Today, I wished time went back..

Sometimes it's a little too late..,
maybe sometimes you forget you are not alone,
maybe you don't really get what it means to share your everyday with another person,
your 'life moments' with the people you love..
How could you know before?
and you will hurt and be hurted so many times...

We are made to be selfish.., I believe it's a 'good' thing.., yes..
There's a time in your life when you HAVE to be selfish..
but then you start evolving and your priorities change..,
of course you will keep being selfish but as we grow up we have to try..
we are better humans when we try..

Today I wished time went back..
I made a fool of myself and I might hurted someone special..

There's a lot of things I don't like..,
I'm really used to say 'NO' and I always did, no matter what..
I'm NOT a typical vanilla sweet girl, I'm strong in my attitudes, opinions and decisions..,
so saying 'NO' is really easy for me.., don't care about social parameters..
This is one of the most important things to me.., the only part of my freedom you all can see..,
do only what my soul tells me, do only whatever I want..
I hate when people follow others like sheeps..
and I used to think I couldn't hate anything more than this..
But today, I discovered I was wrong.., it just lost all the visceral negative meaning for me..

Cause today, I realized, yesterday I was not alone..
and I just discovered that the thing I hate the most is hurting you..

A holistic view of 2008 and New Year resolutions!

I feel free right now, after a peaceful new year's eve in a meaningful place..
I expected more 'action & emotions' maybe, but I know that I couldn't ask for more joy in my life, and that cup of tea at 2am made me feel kind of strange with myself..
Muchos sentimientos encontrados, lots of emotions and some doubts, some fears and lots of hopes..

2008 was a year of facing trouble in my professional area, a year from which I learnt incredible things.
For the first time I can really say I know how it is to work under pressure, I know how to work without resources, to work without any help or support, against all odds, and still achive something.., I know now really how it is to fight for what you believe, even if it is a 45 years old manager who is yelling you otherwise. and I'm so proud of that.
I can say I stood up for some things and I can say I refused some others being faithful to myself..
For the first time, I saw what I have to improve, and for the firt time, I tried and couldn't make it in the first attempt..

2008, in my personal life, was a year of decisions and personal discoveries..

For the first time, I had to accept that some of those decisions were not in my hands.., it was very complex to realize what it means to be in a relationship in terms of decisions.., my decisions, your decisions.., but there was something new: we had 'our' decisions..

I think it is the first time for both of us (even if we had another relationships), so it's not easy at all and it involves quite some maturity and growing up.., but we have a good structure and strong confidence for doing this and it makes me happy..

For 2009 I have some resolutions:

To achieve another step in my professional life
To make a complete change on my habits according to a healthy life style
To get a new soul
To water and take care of my relationship
To give a gift to my parents
To get a new heart
To write